Episode 1: The "Heroes" of Roaringshore

Characters
 * Arin Fletcher - A smooth-talking half-elf bard from Baldur's Gate with a talent for self-promotion and a penchant for cross-dressing.


 * David Leatherman - A scholarly gnome wizard from Tethyr whose magic is useful for incinerating bandits and humiliating certain puffed-up bards.


 * Dauren Barronbog of the Duel Hammers (Dory) - A dwarven barbarian recently freed from the slave pits of Nelanther, where she was an accomplished gladiator. Perhaps too accomplished for her owner's taste.

We begin with Arin, David and Dory aboard The Emerald Dare, a trade ship making the run from Baldur's Gate to Waterdeep. Each is heading to the City of Splendors for their own reasons: Arin to find a place that can properly appreciate a first-class charlatan, David in his pursuit of the intellectual secrets of the North, and Dory to be closer to the lands of her long-lost clan.
 * Quinlee - A human rogue from the tiny hamlet of Roaringshore. Her simple, rustic demeanor conceals a devious personality that wants to turn things that are not hers into things that are.

Three days out from Baldur's Gate the ship arrived at its first stop, the nondescript hamlet of Roaringshore. It is the kind of town that mapmakers forget to put in their work: friendly, unassuming, and largely unremarkable. Here we meet the fourth star of our story, Quinlee. Two days ago the handful of armed men who constitute the town's militia were called away by a contingent of soldiers from Baldur's Gate to investigate some unspecified trouble to the East. Quinlee took the opportunity to do some redistribution of wealth: specifically, redistributing the wealth of Roaringshore's most well-to-do citizens into her own pockets.

Her plans were upended by the sudden arrival of a gang of armed bandits, led by a large and hideous man named Skurn. Cordial, as far as bandits go, they refrained from pillaging the town and contented themselves with drinking the tavernmaster's ale without paying and shaking down ships for exorbitant docking fees. For the most part the townspeople were happy to keep their heads down and wait for them to move on ahead of the militia, due to return in just a day or two.

Those exorbitant docking fees led to a confrontation between the captain of The Emerald Dare--a gruff but professional man named Tullik--and a quartet of Skurn's toughs (who should be described as anything but professional). Just as this argument appeared to turn into a blatant mugging, Arin the bard stepped in to defuse the situation with his silver tongue. Observing that two of the bandits were engaged in a simple dice game, he offered up a wager to the alpha of the group: one roll of the dice, if Arin wins the captain pays the normal fee, and if he loses the captain pays double. Being greedy and non-too bright, the alpha agreed. Arin put on a proper performance and managed to distract the bandits long enough to replace their dice with a weighted pair of his own.

As the rigged game ensued, David prepared a small trap in case things turned ugly: he stealthily withdrew part of the ship's gangplank and replaced the last few feet with an illusion that made it appear as though the gangplank still reached the dock. Dory watched events from the sideline, no doubt doing the arena math in her head: who to kill first and how.

Yet Arin's ruse had the desired result. The alpha, observing a basic tenet of fair play, accepted the normal docking fee. One of his compatriots, however, was not so willing to let the results stand, and an excuse to escalate the situation quickly revealed itself.

Two of the ship's workers, unaware of David's illusion, made their way down the gangplank--and promptly fell through it into the water below. As Dory assisted the soaked crewmen, another duo came down the gangplank to investigate, and promptly fell victim to the same illusion. By now everyone had gathered to observe this anomaly, and the skeptical bandit took the opportunity to accuse Arin of using wizardry to cheat them. He drew his scimitar and the other bandits followed suit, bandits being followers by nature.

Meanwhile, Skurn and some of his cronies were posted up in the tavern, draining the establishment's kegs. In the corner, remaining unnoticed and unremarkable, Quinlee watched and waited.

A brutal fight broke out on the docks. Dory unleashed her eponymous weapons--two stout throwing hammers tethered to her wrists by five feet of leather cord--and flung herself at the bandits. David, watching from the railing of the ship, blasted them with fire and acid spells. Arin stood on a barrel and mocked them, and tried to take credit for David's spells.

One of Skurn's henchment burst into the tavern to tell him that "There's a crazy dwarf killing everybody on the dock!" Skurn, confident and unworried, got up from his seat, gathered his eight remaining goons, and began to slowly make his way to the fight. Quinlee sprang upstairs to the master room Skurn had commandeered, picked his chest, and pocketed his precious jewels--including a fist-sized diamond of unknown but exciting monetary potential. In their place she left a calling card: small piece of parchment with a drawing of a rat, its tail drawn out in dashes, as if asking to be filled in by whoever was unlucky enough to find it.

Skurn arrived at the dock just in time to see the final bandit being hammered into paste by Dory, now soaked in blood and rather in her element. A tense moment followed as Skurn observed the scene with simmering rage, flanked by four of his goons. Another four lurked several steps behind, considering their options upon seeing the carnage.

Dory stepped forward and attempted to slam her hammers together in an intimidating display, but instead slipped in a puddle of blood. While not entirely what she intended, the sight of the angry dwarf flailing around in the blood of her enemies nonetheless had a very unnerving effect. David took this opportunity to work another illusion, this one a menacing voice that seemed to come from behind the amassed bandits, announcing their doom. Skurn and his front rank were unperturbed, but the back rank wavered.

Quinlee, her pockets full of Skurn's jewels, arrived on the scene, ducked into a nearby shed and attempted to mimic the sound of the militia horn. Again, Skurn and his front rank were unconvinced. The back rank, however, decided that between the violent, blood-drenched dwarf, the strange booming voice, and the possible militia horn, now would be an excellent time to tender their resignations. Quietly, by sneaking away between buildings.

Finally, Skurn, tired of the waffling, goaded his men forward by slapping one of them on the buttocks with his scimitar. At this same moment David cast a sleep spell on the bandits, and while it only affected one of them, it happened to be the one that Skurn had slapped. The man promptly collapsed in a snoring heap. Skurn, in a moment of confused fury at this increasingly frustrating series of events, stabbed the sleeping man to death. His remaining men sprang into action and battle once again consumed the docks.

Dory flew into a berserker rage, flinging her hammers in a fury of blood and other people's teeth. Arin darted up the dock and onto the gangplank, deftly leaping over the gap. Once back on the ship, he drew his harp and began to serenade his allies with a paradoxically soothing, yet inspiring song. David, meanwhile, took careful aim and drilled a fire bolt directly into Skurn's chest, burning him severely. Skurn's anger at this point could be described as transcendent. He charged up the deck and onto the gangplank, preparing to slap Arin out of the way to get to the gnome that had wounded him.

Quinlee stepped out of her hiding place with the diamond she had taken from Skurn's chest in her hand. She held it over her head and called his name, announcing that she had found something that belonged to him. Skurn turned, confused and even more angry, but his charge halted. Arin took advantage of this distraction to kick him in the rear. At the same moment David used a mage hand spell to try to push Skurn into the water, but the bandit leader maintained his balance.

It's important now to look at things from Skurn's point of view. He and his group of goons rolled into Roaringshore to take advantage of the militia's absence. It was going to be a simple affair: drink a lot of free ale, shake down some merchants, then go spend the money somewhere more interesting. When he heard that there was a fight he expected a few armed sailors and a captain to kick around. Instead he found his men being smeared all over the docks by honest-to-the-gods adventurers. Spectral voices and phony militia horns were making his men antsy, and at just the moment he ordered the attack, one of them fell asleep at his feet. Murdering the man wasn't something he planned. It was just a crime of frustration. But he hadn't even had time to regret it before a gnome seared off his nipples with magic. Just when he had someone to focus his rage on, there was another distraction. That woman from the tavern, holding up his diamond. Then he got kicked in the butt.

It was all just too much.

Red-faced and screaming, the veins in his head throbbing, Skurn wheeled around and swung his scimitar at Arin. It was a wild blow that missed wildly. He stumbled, flailed, and fell head first into the water. Arin, anticipating a mighty blow that never came, rolled off the other side of the gangplank and was dismayed to find himself alone in the water with Skurn, who by now was so angry that the water around him seemed to boil with shared fury.

But then a shadow appeared over Skurn. Dory stood at the edge of the dock, her hammers dangling from her hands, dripping the blood of the last of his men. With two mighty blows she knocked the floating Skurn unconscious and he sank beneath the waves, assisted by David's mage hand.

Dory, exhausted from her rage, took a nap right there on the blood-soaked dock.

The villagers were grateful, and Arin was quick to take control of the scene, as well as most of the credit. Someone called him a hero, and he helpfully suggested "The Hero of Roaringshore," but in a way that made it sound like it wasn't his idea at all. The tavernmaster--Roaringshore's most prominent citizen--arrived and offered the heroes free room and board at his tavern and as much free food and ale as they desired. Which is basically the same deal the bandits got, but for completely opposite reasons. They even got most of the gold that the bandits had stolen. There's a lesson in that somewhere.

The tavernmaster told the group to take anything that Skurn left in his room, and mentioned the fist-sized diamond that the bandit seemed quite fond of. Quinlee, overhearing, reluctantly handed it over, claiming to have seen one of Skurn's men drop it as he fled. Arin later found Quinlee's calling card in the chest and discussed it with the tavernmaster, who said that a few locals had reported similar drawings left in the place of stolen goods.

Meanwhile, David and Dory had a brief conversation about fallen empires and lost knowledge. The gnome recruited the dwarf as a traveling companion, understanding well the value in having someone around who is adept at bludgeoning things into goo.

Late in the evening, Arin took to his harp to further build up his own legend, and David responded by using mage hand to give him a humiliating wedgie. The bard retired to his room, carried by a strapping farmer's son who was later heard to report that "She is much heavier than she looks."

And so the day ended. In the morning our newly minted heroes will re-board The Emerald Dare for a two-day voyage to the next stop: the village of Lathtarl's Lantern.

It will probably be completely uneventful.

We begin with Arin, David and Dory aboard The Emerald Dare, a trade ship making the run from Baldur's Gate to Waterdeep. Each is heading to the City of Splendors for their own reasons: Arin to find a place that can properly appreciate a first-class charlatan, David in his pursuit of the intellectual secrets of the North, and Dory to be closer to the lands of her long-lost clan.

Three days out from Baldur's Gate the ship arrived at its first stop, the nondescript hamlet of Roaringshore. It is the kind of town that mapmakers forget to put in their work: friendly, unassuming, and largely unremarkable. Here we meet the fourth star of our story, Quinlee. Two days ago the handful of armed men who constitute the town's militia were called away by a contingent of soldiers from Baldur's Gate to investigate some unspecified trouble to the East. Quinlee took the opportunity to do some redistribution of wealth: specifically, redistributing the wealth of Roaringshore's most well-to-do citizens into her own pockets.

Her plans were upended by the sudden arrival of a gang of armed bandits, led by a large and hideous man named Skurn. Cordial, as far as bandits go, they refrained from pillaging the town and contented themselves with drinking the tavernmaster's ale without paying and shaking down ships for exorbitant docking fees. For the most part the townspeople were happy to keep their heads down and wait for them to move on ahead of the militia, due to return in just a day or two.

Those exorbitant docking fees led to a confrontation between the captain of The Emerald Dare--a gruff but professional man named Tullik--and a quartet of Skurn's toughs (who should be described as anything but professional). Just as this argument appeared to turn into a blatant mugging, Arin the bard stepped in to defuse the situation with his silver tongue. Observing that two of the bandits were engaged in a simple dice game, he offered up a wager to the alpha of the group: one roll of the dice, if Arin wins the captain pays the normal fee, and if he loses the captain pays double. Being greedy and non-too bright, the alpha agreed. Arin put on a proper performance and managed to distract the bandits long enough to replace their dice with a weighted pair of his own.

As the rigged game ensued, David prepared a small trap in case things turned ugly: he stealthily withdrew part of the ship's gangplank and replaced the last few feet with an illusion that made it appear as though the gangplank still reached the dock. Dory watched events from the sideline, no doubt doing the arena math in her head: who to kill first and how.

Yet Arin's ruse had the desired result. The alpha, observing a basic tenet of fair play, accepted the normal docking fee. One of his compatriots, however, was not so willing to let the results stand, and an excuse to escalate the situation quickly revealed itself.

Two of the ship's workers, unaware of David's illusion, made their way down the gangplank--and promptly fell through it into the water below. As Dory assisted the soaked crewmen, another duo came down the gangplank to investigate, and promptly fell victim to the same illusion. By now everyone had gathered to observe this anomaly, and the skeptical bandit took the opportunity to accuse Arin of using wizardry to cheat them. He drew his scimitar and the other bandits followed suit, bandits being followers by nature.

Meanwhile, Skurn and some of his cronies were posted up in the tavern, draining the establishment's kegs. In the corner, remaining unnoticed and unremarkable, Quinlee watched and waited.

A brutal fight broke out on the docks. Dory unleashed her eponymous weapons--two stout throwing hammers tethered to her wrists by five feet of leather cord--and flung herself at the bandits. David, watching from the railing of the ship, blasted them with fire and acid spells. Arin stood on a barrel and mocked them, and tried to take credit for David's spells.

One of Skurn's henchment burst into the tavern to tell him that "There's a crazy dwarf killing everybody on the dock!" Skurn, confident and unworried, got up from his seat, gathered his eight remaining goons, and began to slowly make his way to the fight. Quinlee sprang upstairs to the master room Skurn had commandeered, picked his chest, and pocketed his precious jewels--including a fist-sized diamond of unknown but exciting monetary potential. In their place she left a calling card: small piece of parchment with a drawing of a rat, its tail drawn out in dashes, as if asking to be filled in by whoever was unlucky enough to find it.

Skurn arrived at the dock just in time to see the final bandit being hammered into paste by Dory, now soaked in blood and rather in her element. A tense moment followed as Skurn observed the scene with simmering rage, flanked by four of his goons. Another four lurked several steps behind, considering their options upon seeing the carnage.

Dory stepped forward and attempted to slam her hammers together in an intimidating display, but instead slipped in a puddle of blood. While not entirely what she intended, the sight of the angry dwarf flailing around in the blood of her enemies nonetheless had a very unnerving effect. David took this opportunity to work another illusion, this one a menacing voice that seemed to come from behind the amassed bandits, announcing their doom. Skurn and his front rank were unperturbed, but the back rank wavered.

Quinlee, her pockets full of Skurn's jewels, arrived on the scene, ducked into a nearby shed and attempted to mimic the sound of the militia horn. Again, Skurn and his front rank were unconvinced. The back rank, however, decided that between the violent, blood-drenched dwarf, the strange booming voice, and the possible militia horn, now would be an excellent time to tender their resignations. Quietly, by sneaking away between buildings.

Finally, Skurn, tired of the waffling, goaded his men forward by slapping one of them on the buttocks with his scimitar. At this same moment David cast a sleep spell on the bandits, and while it only affected one of them, it happened to be the one that Skurn had slapped. The man promptly collapsed in a snoring heap. Skurn, in a moment of confused fury at this increasingly frustrating series of events, stabbed the sleeping man to death. His remaining men sprang into action and battle once again consumed the docks.

Dory flew into a berserker rage, flinging her hammers in a fury of blood and other people's teeth. Arin darted up the dock and onto the gangplank, deftly leaping over the gap. Once back on the ship, he drew his harp and began to serenade his allies with a paradoxically soothing, yet inspiring song. David, meanwhile, took careful aim and drilled a fire bolt directly into Skurn's chest, burning him severely. Skurn's anger at this point could be described as transcendent. He charged up the deck and onto the gangplank, preparing to slap Arin out of the way to get to the gnome that had wounded him.

Quinlee stepped out of her hiding place with the diamond she had taken from Skurn's chest in her hand. She held it over her head and called his name, announcing that she had found something that belonged to him. Skurn turned, confused and even more angry, but his charge halted. Arin took advantage of this distraction to kick him in the rear. At the same moment David used a mage hand spell to try to push Skurn into the water, but the bandit leader maintained his balance.

It's important now to look at things from Skurn's point of view. He and his group of goons rolled into Roaringshore to take advantage of the militia's absence. It was going to be a simple affair: drink a lot of free ale, shake down some merchants, then go spend the money somewhere more interesting. When he heard that there was a fight he expected a few armed sailors and a captain to kick around. Instead he found his men being smeared all over the docks by honest-to-the-gods adventurers. Spectral voices and phony militia horns were making his men antsy, and at just the moment he ordered the attack, one of them fell asleep at his feet. Murdering the man wasn't something he planned. It was just a crime of frustration. But he hadn't even had time to regret it before a gnome seared off his nipples with magic. Just when he had someone to focus his rage on, there was another distraction. That woman from the tavern, holding up his diamond. Then he got kicked in the butt.

It was all just too much.

Red-faced and screaming, the veins in his head throbbing, Skurn wheeled around and swung his scimitar at Arin. It was a wild blow that missed wildly. He stumbled, flailed, and fell head first into the water. Arin, anticipating a mighty blow that never came, rolled off the other side of the gangplank and was dismayed to find himself alone in the water with Skurn, who by now was so angry that the water around him seemed to boil with shared fury.

But then a shadow appeared over Skurn. Dory stood at the edge of the dock, her hammers dangling from her hands, dripping the blood of the last of his men. With two mighty blows she knocked the floating Skurn unconscious and he sank beneath the waves, assisted by David's mage hand.

Dory, exhausted from her rage, took a nap right there on the blood-soaked dock.

The villagers were grateful, and Arin was quick to take control of the scene, as well as most of the credit. Someone called him a hero, and he helpfully suggested "The Hero of Roaringshore," but in a way that made it sound like it wasn't his idea at all. The tavernmaster--Roaringshore's most prominent citizen--arrived and offered the heroes free room and board at his tavern and as much free food and ale as they desired. Which is basically the same deal the bandits got, but for completely opposite reasons. They even got most of the gold that the bandits had stolen. There's a lesson in that somewhere.

The tavernmaster told the group to take anything that Skurn left in his room, and mentioned the fist-sized diamond that the bandit seemed quite fond of. Quinlee, overhearing, reluctantly handed it over, claiming to have seen one of Skurn's men drop it as he fled. Arin later found Quinlee's calling card in the chest and discussed it with the tavernmaster, who said that a few locals had reported similar drawings left in the place of stolen goods.

Meanwhile, David and Dory had a brief conversation about fallen empires and lost knowledge. The gnome recruited the dwarf as a traveling companion, understanding well the value in having someone around who is adept at bludgeoning things into goo.

Late in the evening, Arin took to his harp to further build up his own legend, and David responded by using mage hand to give him a humiliating wedgie. The bard retired to his room, carried by a strapping farmer's son who was later heard to report that "She is much heavier than she looks."

And so the day ended. In the morning our newly minted heroes will re-board The Emerald Dare for a two-day voyage to the next stop: the village of Lathtarl's Lantern.

It will probably be completely uneventful.